Take my hand, I need to know that you are there.

I know i have said that i don't wanna post about this anymore.
But there is something i must say so oh well.
Go figure.

AHAHA.
After all that, now you want to apologise?
-
Can't you see?
This is hurting both sides.
Don't keep thinking that you are the only one hurt.

You have always taken us for granted.
Everytime you ignored me, I kept quiet.
Maybe I was wrong to do that.
I kept quiet cos i didn't want to ruin our friendship.
And each time you didn't even say sorry.
You thought that you could get angry
and no matter what i would do nothing.
You keep taking and taking and never giving back.
You ate our food, used correction tape to no ends.
We tolerated all that.
We didn't want to lose you as a friend.
We treasured your friendship.
You took it all for granted.
Until we could tolerate no more.

So now it has come to this.
This isn't a question of forgiving or not.
Even if we became friends again, this would still happen, wouldn't it?
There will always be friction between us.


If this time we forgive you, then we become friends again.
after awhile, something will happen again,
there would be a big fight, then everyone would get hurt.
Again.
Is that what you want?
That's not what i want.
Are you sure you are apologising because you treat us as friends?
or is it just that you need to chase away all the loneliness you have caused for yourself?
We are not just things you use to prevent loneliness.
I think we just need to cool it off.
After sometime, after everything disintergrates,
we can become just a little more than say hi friends.
Like what you and Min Hui were last time.
Her say hi friendship with you lasted for three years.
While our close one lasted only a few months before cracking.

For this to have progressed to this stage,
our friendship was not as deep as we thought.
It's like a building with shaky foundations.
Sooner or later, it'll crumble to bits.
That's what our friendship did.
Crumble to bits.
And now we don't even have the bricks to start building all over again.
And no matter what, it's almost impossible to us to go back to what we were six days ago.

And don't forget.
You haven't apologised yet.
So stop saying as if you did it already.